If you miss the previous episode of the OPEN LETTER SERIES, navigate here: LETTER TO THE WORRIED. You are welcome to EPISODE 2 ON #OPLS; Stay blessed and remember to share with friends. God bless you.
Let’s begin with a story…
“Again” he shouted
“Fly… Always… In… Hhhhhh… ” she could feel the stress in her voice, Gina looked at the potbellied man she called her music director, he frowned at her shouting
“Again, Gina; again” he expressed angrily throwing the music sheets on her face. Pacing a few rounds across the studio room, he spoke “You will never be good at it, you’re just like your mother”, he paused studying her expression, a satisfied grin on his face and then he continued “Your mother Celina was never perfect, you’re becoming like her, you’re so rigid and dull; I wonder who will watch you sing” he scoffed at the end of his word.
Gina stood watching him with disgust, why had her mother have to put her in care of the man who was never satisfied with anything but himself? He was always nagging just like her six-feet-below-the-ground father. She had had enough of people telling her what to do, her mother wasn’t left out, failing at her music career while young became the talk of every blessed day when she is at home with her mother. “Everything he says Gina, do; Every damn thing baby, you must do… You mustn’t end up like me… I am a failure and darling you’re too beautiful to be”
True, her mother was a failure, her father a drunkard to death, and now the potbellied director was no way better, he wanted her for one thing good and that was to…have his way beneath her clothes. She never succumbed to his advances, she never will and Gina can clearly understand what saying no to a man like him meant… She was never going to be a singer not when she is under her tutelage. His terms fulfilled… Her dream fulfilled, that’s how it works.
“I said again, sing again” he mouthed loudly. “I am not singing again” she shouted back at him, it was now or never; she had to speak up.
“What did you say? Did you just shout back at me?” he said moving towards her angrily. “I said… Did… You… Just… Shout… Back… At.. Me? ” he poked her with his middle finger against the wall.
She knew how much he loathed being challenged, and that’s exactly what she would do, draw the devil hype its tail and laugh at his exploding anger. Yes, she would do just that.
“I just did and by the way… You can’t keep tossing me here and there all because you wish to have your way, I know better than this”
“Wh..a..t?” he stuttered trying to find words to say
“I ain’t anything like my mother, I wouldn’t sleep with you just to have my music on record, and I think of all the students you claim to be training but sleeping around with” Gina gestured with her hand staring back at him in his face, she could feel the rage burning within and his clenched fist meant something, he couldn’t wait to pounce on her but he couldn’t since they were in the studio, quite a lot of folks were staring.
“Keep your mouth shut Gina or I do” he fussed
“Oh my… Really? Can you? Or should I say will you?” her reply gave him a hint, he couldn’t afford to jeopardize his career all because of her.
“Now, be a good girl Gina and let’s settle this amicably.” he released his fist managing a smile at her.
“I ain’t gonna be a good girl, I never was and I am leaving. So quit being my music director” she confessed smiling back at him, revenge is sweet, she wondered
“You know you can’t, your mother wouldn’t allow you and no one will accept you in this city knowing the daughter of who you are except me”
“Oh.. You’re right there” she teased
“But, I don’t care… I will make a name for myself without you and my mother. I am worth more than what you think of me. I don’t need you, I don’t need my mother, I just need… I just need myself to be ME; that will be enough Hank, it will always be enough” she walked out of his sight picking up her bag rested on the wall, she didn’t care about the people staring, why should she? All she could think of was herself.
“Gina, I bet you’ll regret this” Hank shouted back hitting his legs against the wall frustratingly.
Oh… I won’t Hank and you know it… Gina replied within her as she stepped out of the studio. The fresh Orland air blowing across her face passed a message only she could decipher, it was as though the air whispered to her “You’re worth it Gina” she smiled
Last week, I wrote a letter to the worried, if you haven’t read that; do check it out… FIVE THINGS TO DO WHEN WORRIED. Today on the Open letter series is a letter to those who feel worthless, anyone there feeling like that; if you aren’t in that category, navigate to read other stories on this website you will definitely enjoy reading. Here are a few: WHEN INDEPENDENCE LIES, INTERMISSION: YOUR NATIVE STORY, WHAT IF I DIDN’T: A TRUE STORY
I hope I have your attention, to those who feel worthless… Before we proceed, let’s me tell you something special
You’re not worthless, in actual fact, you’re just special the way you are
I just hope you will smile at that, I can tell you are smiling already. You know the feeling you get when you receive a parcel from someone you love, the thumping of your heart and the blush on your face as you can’t wait to unwrap the parcel, that’s the way I want you to feel when you read this letter.
From our story, we had the rare opportunity of sneak-peeking into the life of a teenage girl called Gina, her mother had been a failure when it comes to music, Gina by sheer luck and divine providence was given the gift of singing just like her mother and boom, her mother thought it actually foolish to direct her daughter to the man who never once appreciated the woman’s talent, perhaps she never knew; let’s agree she didn’t.
Hank, the music director; potbellied maybe with a few scanty beards, a baldy, hairy body and bad breath; I am just trying to paint a picture for you. Hank was a man seeking perfection but was never perfect himself, he grew up so good at discouraging others but never himself. He happens to be Gina’s music director seeking something more than her voice but her body.
A picture of how Gina was raised should paint a picture that her family wasn’t perfect, her dad was another story on his own, her mother; a failure and she… Well, she defied all odds; and that’s what we want to learn from.
Now, to my readers… What’s your story? How were you raised? What makes you feel worthless? The words of self-conceited people that surround you every day? Or is it the achievements of your parents or siblings? Is it your own self? Your fear? Your past? Whatever it is, you can overcome it. I can’t wait to see you hear the wind whispering to you just like Gina
You’re not worthless
3 key things to do when you feel worthless:
- Identify the Source: If a computer isn’t working properly, it is either infected by a virus or a Trojan file. Both are deadly and could harm the computer, an expert will identify the source of the problem either through an assistance tool or software before the system functions properly. Just like the virus, you have to identify the source of what is making you feel worthless. Quote this:
You’re halfway to victory if you can identify your enemies. You don’t fight battles successfully in a blindfold.
- Be stronger than the Source: Someone said “You don’t know how strong you are until being strong is the only option left’. Look at Gina in our story, she didn’t realize she could speak back to Hank until that was the only option she had. After identifying the source of the feeling in you, tackle them, ward off all negativity, train yourself to appreciate YOU. Be stronger than the words you hear, for every negativity you see, hold on to positivity. No one will help you realize your worth, no one but you.
- Learn to enjoy your YOU-ZONE: Wondering what you-zone means, we have heard of comfort, death, war zone, and the likes. Add to your dictionary, the word ‘YOU-ZONE’; the zone where nothing else matters, no negative words matters but your own view about yourself. If all you ever see about yourself in this zone is nothing but a little one, that’s what you’ll reflect for the world to see. Your YOU-ZONE is your mind, your words, your actions, and attitudes. How do you see yourself? Do you see a great and better future ahead for that dream that others belittle? If you do, then you’re not worthless.
Take charge of your mind, or others will control what you think.
Oops… This is getting longer than I imagined but we can’t conclude this writing if we sideline God, that is taking him out of the radar. God, in all, is the radar of everything. I want you to read what the Bible says about you, to those who feel worthless. Reading this, I believe will comfort you greatly:
3 Bible Verse for those who think they are worthless
- Luke 12:6,7 – Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And [yet] not one of them is forgotten or uncared for in the presence of God. But [even] the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not be struck with fear or seized with alarm; you are of greater worth than many [flocks] of sparrows. [AMP]
- Psalms 139:17 – How precious and weighty also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How vast is the sum of them! [AMP]
- Jeremiah 29:11 – I know what I’m doing. I have it all planned out–plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. [MSB]
If God, the creator of YOU never calls you worthless, then be rest assured; you’re worth it beloved. I would love to say more but for the length of words, I will put a stop here.
Get into that zone in your mind where your WORTH isn’t determined by friends, foes, family, the things you see and all others, the zone where all that matters is how God thinks of you and how you see yourself. Because, dear you’re more than enough.
Tune in next Monday for another edition of the open letter series… Until then, stay worthy and loved.